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September 29, 2005

RoyalSuKC

Boooooo! The Royals are crappy. Crappy, crappy, crappy. We have the second-lowest payroll in Major League Baseball. We’ve finished below .500 nine of the last ten years. And we’re about to set the team record for most losses in one season. Glorious.

Not to mention that we’ve been “setting up for a youth movement” for the past three years. We also trade away all of our good, young, talent – Dye, Damon, Beltran – for nothing in return. And on top of all that, Chewy doesn’t even sell Lemonade at the stadium anymore!

But there’s something about having a story in The Onion about the Royals that makes it allllllll better:
Dying Boy Brought In To Cheer Up Kansas City Royals

Posted by Seth at 07:14 PM | Comments (1)

September 28, 2005

Lost and Oceanic-Air.com Trickery?

How good is Lost? Super good. And they’re not trying to hide anything this time around... giving us fans just enough to go on and start trying to find more of. Like these little tidbits from episode two of season two (caution: spoilers!!!).

Another Polar Bear reference to Walt
Micheal’s gift to Walt at the end of the episode was a stuffed polar bear. Sound familiar? Not only have the survivors encountered, and killed, one on the island, but the Spanish Flash comic that Walt was reading in season one also featured a polar bear. Hmmmm.

The Sum of 4 8 15 16 23 42 = 108
First off, last week Jack found that number on the walls of the finally-breached bunker. Now, this week, when Locke entered that number sequence into the computer, the timer (or whatever it was) reset itself to 108.

What’s That Logo?
Did it say Dharma? And did anyone notice the logo that was superimposed on the shark’s (dolphin’s) fin? I say they were the same and it makes me think that the island is definitely being guarded for some reason. And what about the, "there’s still a world out there?"

Talk About Tease
They’ve left us with the same outcome inside the bunker for the second straight week. F’ers!

Oceanic-Air.com Main Image
I’m probably not the first to notice this, but has anyone seen the main image on Oceanic-Air.com? I might be silly, but is that the raft in that image?


In other TV Land news... ER, out. The West Wing, still in... for now. And if you were wondering what became of the new show Commander in Chief, well ABC proclaims that it’s the "number one new drama... on Tuesdays." Congrats!

Posted by Seth at 10:36 PM | Comments (7)

September 25, 2005

The Cost of (Good) Music?

Greed is everywhere, especially in the online music world... let’s take a look at some recent stories – iPod nanos cost about $90 to make, Cingular wants a music download service (with "slightly higher" prices), and then there’s this gem: labels hit back at Apple, now want share of iPod revenue.

What’s that about, you ask? This is the nuts and bolts of it...

There’s the dilema – now that songs are a mere buck, record labels think they have a right to get some profit sharing from Apple on iPod sales since listeners aren’t buying full records.

Bogusness.

First off, how in the hell are labels “used to people buying full albums?” That’s total bs. Anyone remember buying cassette and cd singles? I do. And if I remember back far enough, weren’t cassette singles about $2 for two songs and cd singles about $4 for four songs? Quick math problem, what’s two divided by two? Here’s a harder one, what’s four divided by four? Shut up.

Secondly, do you (the record labels) get money from walkman sales, car stereo sales and home stereo sales? No. Shut up.

Third point, if you somehow get Steve Jobs to agree and give you some profit sharing (at which point I’ll host a carnivale in my butt, everyone’s invited), let’s not forget the little people – the podcasters. I’m sure at least ONE person in this world was swayed to buy an iPod so they could listen to podcasts on the go. Cheap plug. Shut up.

Fourther, offer exclusives on iTunes with album releases. Oh wait, you already do. Shut up.

Fifthest, sorry that other music stores have opened (some with different pricing schemes) and failed. Shut up.

Sixerestly, and perhaps the most arguable point, produce better music and you won’t have the problem of people buying one song here and one song there. The past ten (at least) albums that I’ve bought have been because I want the full album... I KNOW the full album will be good. The only things I buy singles of are rap and hip-hop – a genre notorious for creating albums as a vehicle for one, maybe two, good songs. Shut up.

If record labels would produce better music, then I’m willing to bet that while single song sales wouldn’t decrease much, albums sales would increase. People like good music. Why do you want to push bad music on them when they’re not going to listen to it anyway? Giving consumers the option of buying a single song is the optimum option, the crux of customer service, the ultimate scenario. Allow the customer to do what they want and entice them in other ways – exclusive album content, EPs, etc.

It’s a shame that the music industry is just that, an industry. It’s not about sales people, it’s about producing a product that makes listeners happy.

Posted by Seth at 10:08 PM | Comments (3)

ER: Time of Death, Long Ago

When I wasn’t trying to be around my television on Thursday nights, something was up. When CSI started demolishing it in ratings, I knew things were bad. When Dr. Greene was killed off, I was barely hanging on. But when Dr. Carter left for Africa, I said that I probably wasn’t going to watch it anymore. After watching the season premiere of ER (time to take Noah Wyle off the graphic, guys), the first season sans Wyle, I confirmed my prediction.

ER is no longer programmed to be recorded by my DVR.

It was a long time coming, though. Hell, the show has been on for 10+ years now and it hasn’t made a time slot jump yet. Impressive as that is, it’s far past time that I spend an hour a week caring for the doctors at County and their personal lives.

So why now? For me it’s as I stated above: no more Wyle. He was the glue of that show for me. As much as I like Maura Tierney (Abby), Mekhi Phifer (Pratt) and Goran Visnjic (Kovac), Noah Wyle was the one reason I kept watching week after week.

I won’t miss the switching of actors for different family members in Linda Cardellini’s (Sam) life – both her ex-husband and son have now been replaced. I won’t miss the silly lesbian storyline for Laura Innes (Weaver). I won’t miss the typecasting of Shane West (Ray) and the thought of having a “wild rock star” doctor. And as much as I liked Wyle, I won’t miss his crummy storyline of all the on-again off-again girls in his life – why couldn’t he and Abby just have worked out? Ultimately, I definitely won’t miss Alex Kingston (Dr. Corday), she just sucked.

But ER has been good to me over the years. Favorite moments include the stabbing arc with Kellie Martin (Lucy) and Wyle. The helicopter slicing Paul McCrane’s (Dr. Romano) arm off – and then over a year later, another helicopter finishing the job. Those were the two that really stood out to me. Good tv, fun tv.

All in all, I find it strange to start removing shows from my DVR, I feel like I’ve turned my back on a friend. Sure I’ve removed shows here and there, but those were shows that were cancelled (or just over for good). To actually take a show out of rotation simply because you’re done with it is very strange.

I’m scared that The West Wing might be the next to go.

Posted by Seth at 11:34 AM | Comments (4)

September 23, 2005

A Q&A Session With Seth

The agency I work at has an internal newsletter that’s published about once every three weeks. The purpose of the newsletter is to tie the three offices together with client/work news from each city and also to promote individual/team achievements. One portion of the brief newsletter is a Q&A ... and this issue, was mine!

Behold the zaniness of Seth (interactive art director, KC)! (warning, this post may [read: does] contain offensive language!)

What’s the one thing people would be surprised to learn about Seth Gunderson?
How about we play 1 Truth, 6 Lies? Ready? Go. I’m 50 Cent’s stunt double. I’ve jumped out of a plane and done a triple-gainer into the Danube, in the nude. “I eat pieces of s*** like you for breakfast,” was my contribution to “Happy Gilmore.” I think I’m a descendant of Set, the Egyptian God of Death. I once invented a robot vampire and named him Willy. I’ve thrown many virgins into erupting volcanoes, for fun. I truly do eat pieces of s*** like you for breakfast.

As coach of the SHS-KC softball team, how do you explain the heartbreaking playoff loss to your old agency, VML, a team you had beaten twice earlier in the season?
Hmmm, good question ... and a tough one at that. No, wait! They won because they’re f***ing cheaters! Must be nice to have you’re A-team just waiting in the wings to bail your crappy B-team out during the playoffs. We gave them a good game, though, and karma’s a bitch ... they lost in the Championship game. Eat it, a-holes.

Why is it that Jon Kowing has several videos of you dancing a dance that makes people a little uncomfortable?
Look Neil, if by “uncomfortable” you mean “leaving the room and heading straight to the bathroom,” then I don’t know what you mean. You were the only one that did that, so why don’t YOU tell US.

What is the one Web site you can’t live without?
I dislike your rules. Here are some of the best from my RSS list: Crasymaker.com, TheImpulsiveBuy.com, TheOnion.com, VML.com (heh, burn) and myjellybean.com.

(Editor’s note: We apologize for Seth’s hostility to all mankind, especially to those of us at The Quiver. We’ll try to get him some help.)

Posted by Seth at 01:06 PM | Comments (0)

September 21, 2005

Let Me Run An Idea Past You

One of these days I’m going to own a television station. It’ll be mega-sweet, I’ll own a good one that plays good television shows and classic movies. You’ll always want to watch it and you’ll be upset when you miss something. The news will be great and only negative when need-be, very objective at all times. I’ll play wonderful cartoons, yes, cartoons, on Saturdays for the kids... no one likes that Saved By The Bell crap that’s on everywhere these days. It’ll be America’s favorite station.

And here’s the idea... I’ll play the television shows at quieter volumes than the commercials. That way when you turn the volume up to hear the show(s), you’ll be blasted out of the living room when during the commercial break! Isn’t that a genius idea?

Oooo! Oooo! I’ve got another one. I’ll own a kick ass theme park (one amusement park and one water park, next to each other) and run ads on prime time television (the most expensive). Get this, the ads will promote the water park even though it’s closed for the season! I’m a genius.

Posted by Seth at 10:13 PM | Comments (1)

Fall Season Means New TV Shows

NOTICE: Looking for my preview of the 2006 Fall Season? Look no furthur.

ABC Screwed us.

That’s my initial thought when considering this fall’s new television show offerings. When Lost and Desperate Housewives burst onto the scenes last year, we finally experienced some fresh writting that wasn’t another canned verson of CSI or Law & Order. Even House, a show which I still haven’t watched, garnered some attention for Fox. Last season was the year that jump-started networks into thinking outside the box for new shows... but will it pay off?

Maybe. As a co-worker noted, the networks are becoming creative in the way they market their new, and existing, shows. It’s not about trying to lure large masses to watch your show – okay, it really still is about that. But, networks now have their sights set on what’s called the “super fan” – people who are obsessive about certain shows and are seen as peer-influencers. I’m a super fan for many shows (not so much for 24 anymore *wink*) and you’ve read all about them on this site. Did you watch any of the shows I rave about because of what I said?

Does it matter? It does to the networks, that’s for sure, word of mouth is a very powerful form of advertising... and it’s free! Because of super fans, ABC really shook things up last year with their different shows, especially in the Nielsen Ratings. Big ratings = advertising dollars. That’s big money, folks.

And when it comes to getting better ratings, you’ve got to follow what worked last year. So now, ABC is the leader of the pack and there is a slew of new and different shows for this fall.

Seth’s Fall TV Season Preview (of shows that I want to talk about):

Commander in Chief – ABC, Tuesdays at 9 Eastern
This show is so over-hyped it’s ridiculous. You can’t tell people that it’s a very dramatic show, you have to make them feel it. Also, Genna Davis makes me want to barf. This will NOT be another West Wing and my predicition. No, far from it and it’ll be one of the first shows cancelled.

Invasion – ABC, Wednesdays at 10 Eastern
Hailed as this year’s best new drama, this one might have a shot. It feels along the same vein as Lost, which is a very good thing, especially since it’s getting a Lost lead-in the hour before. Looks just a little silly, but also serious enough to be fun.

Nightstalker – ABC, Thursday at 9 Eastern
Thursday used to be the hot bed of prime time activity, just as NBC. So this is a re-make of an older series, but I still don’t know much about it. I do, however, know that Frank Spotnitz (The X-Files, anyone?) is the Executive Producer for the show. That’s a good thing.

E-Ring – NBC, Wednesdays at 9 Eastern
Ha! Dennis Hopper with a ‘stache! Might as well call this bo-ring.

My Name Is Earl – NBC, Tuesdays at 9 Eastern
I love Jason Lee. I’m scared because sitcoms are so hit or miss (with many more misses these days) and I don’t want him to fail. It’s getting good press and it’s paired with The Office, not too shabby. Definitely checking this one out.

Surface – NBC, Mondays at 8 Eastern
I had high hopes for this one, but apparently it’s hard to make a good underwater flick and/or tv show (see “Sphere,” “Deep Star Six,” “Below,” SeaQuest DSV, etc.). If Commander in Chief gets yanked soon, I suspect this will beat it to the punch.

Criminal Minds – CBS, Thursdays at 10 Eastern
Is crime drama the ONLY thing CBS can do? Switch it up some!

Ghost Whisperer – CBS, Fridays at 8 Eastern
Wait, I spoke too soon. Hang on... okay, done laughing.

Threshold – CBS, Fridays at 9 Eastern
Aliens. Data from Star Trek. A midget. Sounds like gold. Gold covered crap, that is.

How I Met Your Mother – CBS, Mondays at 8:30 Eastern
This might be the only show I check out on CBS, besides football. And it might be only because I have a crush on Alyson Hannigan.

Prison Break – Fox, Mondays at 9 Eastern
I’ve already watched four episodes of this and I’m hooked. Very inventive and very well thought-out. Fun show.

Bones – Fox, Tuesdays at 8 Eastern
The X-Files + Angel + CSI = blah.

Killer Instinct – Fox, Fridays at 9 Eastern
You got the Friday slot... see ya. Oh yeah, one more thing, “Basic Instinct” called, they want their logo back you cheap hacks.

Everybody Hates Chris – UPN, Thursdays at 8 Eastern
The Wonder Years meets Bernie Mac. Genius. Critics are raving and I’m DVRing. Can’t wait.


Not a bad effort, from most, in my opinion. We’ll see who stick and who doesn’t, but at least we’re getting some new options and not just more reality shows shoved down our throats.

Posted by Seth at 12:38 PM | Comments (5)

September 15, 2005

I Met Murphy Once

My good friend, Tug, had to put his dog, Murphy, to sleep yesterday. He wrote a eulogy about him and posted it on his blog. Get the tissues ready, this one’s good. And if you have a pet, hug him/her extra hard tonight and tell it that you love them. Now, go celebrate Murphy’s passing.

Posted by Seth at 09:40 AM | Comments (3)

September 12, 2005

What Time Is It, Really?

6:45 (bathroom clock)
7:39 (coffee pot clock – after one day of being on)*
7:49 (microwave)
7:52 (alarm clock)
7:55 (cable box)
7:55 (computer)
7:55 (cell phone)
7:55 (car)

Those are the times of my various clocks show when being compared to each other. Some are small variances and others are large, but all in all, I know which clocks to look at if I want the right time (cable box, computer or cell phone).

Why look at those? Simple, they’re tied to the atomic clock, which means they’re all as accurate as can possibly be – which fits in nicely with some of my anal tendencies.

The nice thing about certain clocks being tied into the atomic clock is that they’re automatically updated, re-synced, and adjusted when needed. For example, when I cross into a new time zone, my phone changes. When daylight savings occurs, my cable box (and phone, and computer) changes. All I have to worry about is changing the other clocks in my place.

But being tied into the atomic clock poses an interesting question for cable subscribers – specifically Tivo/DVR users. If you (the cable box) know exactly what time it is, when television shows run over their scheduled time (or when NBC decides to start shows earlier than they’re supposed to), why can’t you make sure and record that for me? In addition... why can’t I drill down into 15 minute intervals? You tell me that the Clone Wars cartoon is five minutes long, so what comes on after that? Nothing, apparently.

Soon (October 30) we’ll be setting our clocks back for Daylight Savings Time (tip: Spring Forward, Fall Back). Like I mentioned, I won’t have to worry about my main clocks, just the stupid ones. Or will I?

The short answer, no, not this year. The longer answer, yes, you might have to worry next year. Why? Because President Bush signed the energy bill that will extend Daylight Savings time an entire month next year. So, big deal, right? I didn’t think it would be a big deal, that is, until I read this possible drawback:

Computers, Clocks and Gadgets – Many electronic devices automatically adjust for day light saving time. Some of these devices will show incorrect times. Some computer software will have to be reprogrammed.

Some computer software will have to be reprogrammed. You mean like Y2K? How did that happen? You just programmed the entire cable system to automatically change on a giant list of dates and that’s not easy to change? Why didn’t you foresee something possibly changing in the future and spend a tiny bit more time to make this a non-issue?

So if it’s a potential problem with clocks tied to the atomic clock, then here’s your solution. When daylight savings occurs, you hire some dude to sit there at the precise time and, get this, change the clock ahead (or back) one hour. To much of a hassle? THEN FIX YOUR SILLY SYSTEM!!!

* Is this not one of the more important ones? It needs to be accurate for those of you who drink coffee.

Posted by Seth at 12:45 PM | Comments (1)

September 07, 2005

My Groundhog Day

How could one NOT love the movie "Groundhog Day?" I don’t know, but I love that damn show, and it often makes me think about what things I would enjoy to relive over and over for the rest of my life. Here are some, in no particular order:

Someone washing my hair (like at a haircut appointment)
I just had my hair cut today and I can never get over the feeling of someone washing your hair. But I think it’s also important that you’re in a chair and you’re leaning backwards – I fall asleep almost every time. It’s nothing like a dentist visit. In fact, quite the opposite.

Fresh pair of socks
I don’t mean a clean pair of socks, I mean new. This one is probably overly cliché, but important nonetheless.

Clean bed sheets
I could elaborate here, but not gonna.

Nachos
Salty chips, spicy salsa, creamy sour cream, guacy guacamole, zingy chicken (yes, running out of good descriptors) and some cheesy queso... mounds of goodness in my mouthness.

SG-TV ...
All new episodes of Futurama, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Sealab 2021, Arrested Development, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Lost, Deadwood, Ed, Carnivalé, Entourage, The West Wing, The Clone Wars, and anything that I like but can’t remember right now ... every day, all day. No local news, EVER!

Chillin’ with my boys
Todd, Aaron and Trip. And Simon, too. We could, might invite friends, maybe.

I don’t know, it could get old after a while. But then there’s always the possibilities of day trips.

Posted by Seth at 02:48 PM | Comments (8)

September 05, 2005

Don’t You Dare Work Today

Ahhhhh. Labor Day. Or for you French enthusiasts.... ahhhh, Labour Day. Pig Latin? Ahhhhhay... Aborlay Ayday. In any which case, today is Labo(u)r Day, which means we don’t work! That’s right... we’re not celebrating a death or a war today. We’re not celebrating a bunny or a turkey today. We’re definitely not celebrating a president or a sport (Boxing Day, anyone?). Today we celebrate the working men and women of America.

It’s a celebrated day that was started over 100 years ago and the idea was to balance a workers life into eight hour segments – eight for work, eight for play and eight for rest. That sounds pretty sweet. As a working man, I can appreciate one extra day off a year. So for those of you who work, today isn’t one of those days. Take the day off and relax!

Unless you’re a gas station attendant. I suspect some families will need gas today and you’ll need to be there to overcharge them for it. Otherwise, take the day off.

Well, unless you’re a newspaper delivery person. Those things run on subscription, ya know. And some people can’t live without their dailies. Besides, if there’s any great Labor Day sales going on, I’ll bet they’re in there. Mailmen, you’re okay. Take the day off, like the rest of us.

The rest of us NOT including grocery store employees. One of the “typical things to do on a Labor Day,” is a picnic lunch. I doubt many of us planned ahead for this, so we’ll need to swing by before we go to the park. Besides, my milk had a freakin’ quick expiration date on it this time, I’m going to need some more of that.

Department store clerks, sorry, but who’s going to deal with all the shitty sale shoppers? You’ve got to be open today, you advertised all weekend that today was the day of super sales! Maybe we could haggle over some queen-sized bed sheets, or better yet, maybe we could get in some very detailed conversation and you can tell me that you can’t answer all of my questions because the usual salesperson has the day off. That’d be great.

The rest of us, we’re taking the day off. Except the Police. And Firemen. And Hospital people. Drunkards and speeders still drive today, fires can still be started and I’m sure someone is going to get hurt today. Though I don’t wish for any of that to happen, it’s almost inevitable. So you guys have to work today, crappy, I know.

Movie theater people, you gotta work, too. Just what you wanted to do on a nice day in Kansas City, I’m sure, but you HAVE to. All ticket and concession sales aren’t fully automated, yet, and someone has to set the films up (not to mention the 17 commercials and trailers before each one, oh, and the crappy ads and trivia, too). And, and, and... the weekend estimates aren’t in for which movie made the most, yet, because it’s a holiday weekend... today counts big time – there are a lot of people who don’t have to work today (see calendar).

City road workers, YOU can actually have the day off. It’s strange, because it hardly looks like you work much any way, but today is your day. Maybe you could spend some time figuring out where all the damn metal plates are – oh wait, you lost count of them. At least the city is doing something about it now.

Librarians, day off. Pizza deliverers, gotta work. Royals baseball player, day off (though you’ve taken way too many of those this year). Chiefs cheerleader, private show? No? Damn. Then take the day off. News anchor, gotta work. Television station owner, do you ever?

Apartment landlords, off. Vetrenarians, off. Doctors, off (unless you work at a hospital). 24-hour “answering service” for the aforementioned jobs, gotta work (and not help any of us, because we call to talk to those specific people).


So some of us will be working and most of us won’t. Sorry, that’s the breaks. Regardless, I hope everyone has a nice Labor-less day (except those mentioned above, you gotta work on a day of not working, but I’ve explained all that).

Happy The Labor Day!!!

Posted by Seth at 09:20 AM | Comments (2)

September 04, 2005

Grand Openings

What’s the first thing you see before a movie, or television show, starts? No, I’m not talking about the 17 commercials and trailers you see. I’m talking about the opening credits. Before the movie “Se7en” came out, I rarely paid attention to them... but since that movie, I try to acknowledge every opening sequence for every show I watch. In college, I wrote my senior thesis about the opening credits of movies and their effectiveness to establish mood and tone. Yeah, I know I’m a nerd, it’s a fascinating subject, though.

Over the past few years I’ve been obsessively addicted to certain tv shows, big shocker. Oddly enough, week-in and week-out, I choose to watch some opening credits and quickly fast-forward through others.

Ed
Foo Fighter song, or not (but the Foo-version is greatly preferred), this was one of the best, and shortest, opening credits ever. Really put me in the mood for the show.

Carnivale
Easily one of the most creative, and thought-out, title sequences I’ve seen in a long time. In fact, people liked it so much that HBO did a “behind the scenes” featurette on it. Really cool.

Entourage
Another Ed-like sequence, the song really gets you... err, me.

Rome
This is a new one, but interesting. I don’t know if I’ll continue to watch it every episode, though. HBO seems to have a problem with making opening sequences kind of similar (especially the music).

Lost
This is classified as a "realism" opening sequence. Aside from the bold and simple floating Lost title, the credits run at the bottom of the screen while the show is starting. No music, no fanciness. The producers want you to feel as if you’re a part of the show.

ER
This was once a fun sequence to watch, until nearly all of the stars were replaced with new ones. It was awesome to create something that contained good, heartfelt clips... but those are hard to re-create, especially when viewers don’t have huge emotional connections with the current stars.

Deadwood
I like the music and the scenery, but there’s something about it that I don’t really care to take part of.

Battlestar Galactica
This show has two openings, sort of. There’s the text-based explanation of the Cylons at the very beginning (which = good), then there’s the sorta cheesy sci-fi-styled real opening (which = bad). What’s worse, at the end of the real opening, there’s a 5-10 second montage of footage that’s going to happen in that very episode... who wants to see that?

Futurama
There’s the simple fact that it has two, or three, different things every time it runs. Plus, it’s one of the most complexly animated sequences ever and took many weeks to complete.

24
For as much shit as I’ve been giving this show lately, it has one of the better, and more distinguishable, sequences out there.

Aqua Teen Hungerforce
MY NAME IS...!!! Superb. (psssst! wanna know what the lyrics are?)

Desperate Housewives
This is one of the new-school arty sequences. I think it was influenced by titles like Carnivale, but I have no proof of it. However, I don’t usually partake in it.

The X-Files
The whistles! Awesome. The fact that it kept the same sequence even when the show had millions of production dollars... awesome. The fact that it changed when Duchovny was pretty much gone from the show... lame.

Posted by Seth at 11:52 PM | Comments (0)