This is the third in a series of 5 blog posts that talk about my favorite things in regards to my senses. Yeah, it's a bit dorky, but just go with it.
"I'm too drunk to taste this chicken." The late Colonel Sanders
was quoted as saying such never said that – but it was a hilarious line from Talladega Nights. Speaking of race cars, it's time I tell you all some of my favorite tastes. Surprisingly, they all center around eating. It's no secret that I'm a fairly picky eater, but you may have never known that I'm also NOT a supertaster.
But let the record show that while I've never been identified as a supertaster, I DO have a large distate for brussel sprouts, cabbage, kale, coffee and spinach (all listed as common food sensitivities for supertasters).
At any rate, below are 5 of my favorite tastes. Listed in random numerical order – yes, you can randomly list things in a numerical order. Need proof? Look below. They may go in descending order, but the numbers associated with them are random. Trust me. It's true.
5. Mashed Potatoes
My love affair stated way back to when I was probably around one year old. I'm guessing that because its a safe bet that my Grandma Gunderson made mashed potatoes for my family then and they probably allowed me to eat some and make a complete mess of myself. Since that day (that I'll never remember), I've never looked back. If I ate mashed potatoes with every meal, it wouldn't be enough. I like potatoes in general, but the mashed variety is my preferred way to consume starch. And if I'm feeling extra strategic, I'll make sure to save enough potatoes to make lefse – because if potatoes and butter is good enough, try making them into pancakes and adding sugar! Boo-yah legit city.
As you may, or may not, know, I'm a fool for banana jokes. I'm also a fool for bananas. I do believe that they're the perfect fruit. It might be because I'm not a big fan of other fruits (which is none of your business, thank you). Simply put, bananas taste delicious. But when you think about what a banana is, it's kinda weird. It's a soft, yellow fruit that grows inside of a plastic-ish sleeve. It really behooves the question "why hasn't someone drawn a giant eagle with banana talons?" Maybe it doesn't REALLY behoove that question, but, you need to get on that, Bruno.
3. Hot/Wing Sauce
Hot slash wing sauce? Really? Yes, person who just asked that question, really. First off, it passes the SethyG Sniff Test, so it already has a + in my book. Second of all, it's hot. Third of all, it's vinegary. Fourth of all, you can put it on chicken, eggs, tacos, french fries and pizza (but that's about all). Fifth of all, it will probably give you poocano, which could be considered a negative for most people. I'll include myself on said list just so you won't think I'm a freak. In any case, hot/wing sauce is the best. I highly recommend Cholula, Ott's Wing Sauce, El Yucateco, the classic Tabasco and the Kansas City favorite, G Sauce from Go Chicken Go.
2. Cold Tap Water
This one is easy. Make sure you're really hot, then go inside and pour you some cold tap water. Or ... wait until it's winter, then go to the kitcehn and pour you some cold tap water. Another option, put some hot sauce on some food, eat it, then go to the kitchen and pour you some cold tap water. Need I continue? Too bad.
1. Chocolate and Peanut Butter
Chocolate = heaven. Peanut butter = heaven, too. Chocolate + Peanut Butter = food boners. Especially when your name is Reese and you kick ass at combining the two in (some) perfect ratios. Yes, buttercups are my favorite. Quickly climbing the charts is peanut butter M&M's. There isn't much more to say other than I want to smear Reese's all over my face and lick it off a la Scooby-Doo when he slurps the cotton candy off of his face (I'm pretty sure it was cotton candy, right?). Better yet, smear it on your face, and just TRY to pay me to NOT lick it off. Yeah, disgusting. And awesome.
There you have it. I wish all of those tastes were in my belly right now, but they're not. Too bad. Why don't you go cry about it for me?
+ original post date: August 17, 2011 10:50 PM
+ categories: Seth's Senses