If Hollywood Stories Were Real #1

This is the first in a new series of posts. The premise is simple: a perspective of an innocent by-stander from (name of movie) where the plot were true in real-life. You get to guess what the movie is… though, most of the time it probably won’t be too hard. Enjoy.

Everyone always told me college would be a real eye-opener. They said that it’s an experience like none other. Still others said that I’d never want to leave college, stay there forever. Most of those people were right, but I left after the first year… and my life has been a wreck ever since…

I’m a nerd, or, used to be. I graduated with top honors from my high school, but all that doesn’t matter when you go to college. After graduating from high school, I was scared. I knew that I was starting over from the bottom. But I was smart and I knew that if I surrounded myself with the right people, I’d be just fine. By the time I got to college, I was confident that I’d be okay.

That’s when I met Todd Howard, a fellow nerd and biology major. He was a nice kid, quiet and timid, and wanted to be a Vet… but somehow he ended up at college on a boxing scholarship. I first met him in Biology 101, but it turned out that our rooms were on the same floor in Rembrandt Hall. He and I didn’t hang out much, mostly because I hated his idiot roomie “Stiles” and his overweight friend, “Chubby.”

Todd was also in my biology study group. The guy was smart, sharp as a tack, but it wasn’t long into the first semester before he started to not show up for our weekly meetings. No one knew why.

One day, everyone was talking about this goofy story about Todd and how he ruined a reception by dressing up like a dog and causing a ruckus. Later that evening, it was said that Todd and “Stiles” were overheard arguing in their dorm room. Then, the very next day, someone pulled a prank on Todd by placing an open petry dish full of fleas under his desk in History class.

I felt sorry for the guy.

Unfortunately for Todd, the very next day was our first boxing match of the year. Our team was getting their butts kicked, but somehow that fat-ass “Chubby” got a win. The last fight of the day belonged to Todd and some jerk from The Academy. Our coach obviously wasted a scholarship on Todd, for he wasn’t in the ring for 30 seconds before he was knocked down. Everyone in the crowd was sad, except for The Academy fans, who were hootin’ and hollering, just ready to go and celebrate.

Then the weirdest thing happened. Everyone started to quiet down when a low growl started to get louder and louder. The referee kept counting and I think he got to five, when… Todd, or, whatever the hell he was, sprang what seemed like 20 feet into the air and landed on his feet in the middle of the ring. This thing wasn’t Todd anymore, but it was wearing Todd’s boxing outfit and it was very hairy. It looked like a dog, or a man-dog, I suppose. Whatever it was, it was ugly as hell. For whatever reason the fight wasn’t stopped and this thing pounded the shit out of the other boxer. Afterwards, everyone rushed the ring and carried the thing out on their shoulders. “Stiles” seemed extremely happy. I, on the other hand, was very creeped out and took off.

That night, there was a big party on campus to celebrate the thing’s victory… though I’m pretty sure The Academy won the overall match 4-2. Who cares, right, it’s party time! Stupid jocks. I decided to go see what was going on and invited Amy, an engineering student friend of mine, to come along. I had told her about Todd’s “transformation,” but she didn’t believe me, so we went to the party in hopes to see the thing. Sure enough, just after “Stiles” showed up, he grabbed the microphone and introduced a very special guest.

It was Todd, or the thing, and he was dressed up in some tacky blue suit. He looked uncomfortable. Todd grabbed the microphone and instead of growling into it, like he was doing in the boxing ring, he sang a song. SANG A SONG!!! He sang “Do You Love Me?”, though I’m pretty sure it wasn’t him singing at one point because the song kept on going when he was leading a massive choreographed dance. As ludicrous of a story as this may sound, Amy and I were having fun and couldn’t help ourselves from dancing.

From then on Todd was a star on campus. He walked around everywhere as the man-dog. Everyone wanted to hang out with him and the hot chicks were all over him. Teachers were giving him A+’s on all of his work and he somehow bought a brand new Corvette and was driving that around everywhere. “Stiles” seemed to be making the most of the situation by selling t-shirts, and other paraphernalia, that said “Teen Wolf” on them. One afternoon, I even witnessed Todd run and catch a “Teen Wolf” frisbee in his mouth, like a freaking dog.

This “Teen Wolf” thing spurred something in Amy’s memory. She said that she had heard a crazy story about some kid at a high school in Beacon Hill that played on the basketball team. Apparently, this kid turned into a dog-man, too. After a little research at the city library, we found out that this story was true, and the kids name was Scott Howard. He and Todd had to be related! And get this, the coach of the basketball team at that high school was now the boxing coach that gave Todd the scholarship! Coincidence?

The thing that got us most was that Scott Howard wasn’t called a man-dog in any of the stories we read. He was referred to as a werewolf. A werewolf… WAIT!!! A werewolf!?! On the campus!?! Jesus Christ! Half the kids on campus worshiped the dam thing, wore t-shirts with “Teen Wolf” on them. I knew we were all going to die and I had to tell everyone.

I tried to tell my closest friends about Todd’s true identity, but they just laughed. Amy and I tried to tell the Dean, but he wouldn’t listen, either. Everyone thought that the werewolf was the coolest guy in the world. He’s not THAT cool, he dumped his sweet little “girl next door” girlfriend for that skanky southern blonde.

Then it happened. I was supposed to meet Amy one afternoon for a picnic lunch but she never showed up. I looked everywhere for her, nothing. I decided to check down in her dorm’s laundry room, I wish to God I hadn’t. I turned on the lights and there was blood everywhere. In the middle of it all lay Amy’s body. She had been mauled to death. It could only mean one thing. Todd.

I left campus in fear of my life that night, never to return. I left all of my stuff behind, all my clothes, books, beakers and bunsens… everything. The city police found Amy’s body the next morning and after a week of investigation, my sudden disappearance made me prime suspect for her death. I’m now a wanted man, forced to live my life on the run, because of that fucking werewolf.

I heard once that Todd started to live a more normal life and even won the boxing championship without being the wolf… whoop-de-fucking-doo. I don’t give a damn. I’ve never heard from my friends again, in fact, I haven’t heard much from that college either… maybe he ate everyone, he IS a fucking werewolf, after all.

A werewolf. What are the chances?

+ original post date: July 1, 2005 10:30 AM
+ categories: If Hollywood Stories Were Real


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